just 39 days

in just 39 days it will be my birthday. last year i had a joint cocktails birthday party with my sister (our birthdays are just 5 days apart). except i was drinking mocktails, because i was on some ridiculous drugs from my doctor, for like 6 WHOLE MONTHS!!!! i wasn't allowed a drop of alcohol. everyone forgot this, so i had bottles of tia maria (my fave), baileys, etc. etc. bought especially for me for the holiday season, that i couldn't drink. i fully intend to make up for it this year. i digress...

my 24th year was the first time in my entire life that i made a list of birthday resolutions. i was pretty depressed (not ACTUALLY clinically depressed) from 21-22.5, accumulating in HORRIBLE blow-outs at christmas/birthday time. never, ever to be repeated. 1.5 years is a long time to live a mediocre life. i KNEW 24 would be better. now i have just 39 days to fulfill my resolutions (the ones which i have the power to):

+ Make packed lunches for work

I SWITCHED JOBS, AND MY MOM IS MY NEW BOSS, SO MOSTLY SHE MAKES MY PACKED LUNCHES. SCORE!
+ Find out if the boy I like loves me

THIS OLD DRAMA!!!!
+ Finish my long-overdue Breaking Free bible study (still on week 4 after 1.5 years...)

NO. EMBARRASSING. I STILL HAVE TIME TO DO THIS ONE. LET'S GO...
+ Get lots of stamps in my passport, incl. California

THIS YEAR: AUSTRIA, FRANCE, INDIA, BUT NO CALIFORNIA. NEXT YEAR ROLL-OVER.
+ La La La and play guitar

I NOW OWN THE MOST AWESOME MIC ON THE PLANET. £ WELL SPENT! AND I KNOW 6 GUITAR CHORDS REALLY WELL. PRACTICE MAKES PERFECT!
+ Forgive imperfections quickly

I DID SO WELL. UNTIL THIS MONTH...I HAVE JUST BEEN SO OVER EVERYONE.
+ Furnish my sweet home

YESSS. I LOVE MY SWEET HOME. CAN'T WAIT TO PUT MY CHRISTMAS DECORATIONS UP AND BUY ONE OF THOSE CUTE FERRIS WHEELS THAT SINGS SILENT NIGHT (FROM DOBBIES GARDEN CENTRE).
+ Arrive at work by 9am (I am being realistic; work starts at 8.30am)

FAIL. BUT MY NEW JOB STARTS AT 9AM, AND I AM USUALLY THERE BY 9.05AM. SO MAYBE THIS CONSTITUTES A PASS.
+ Go back to being happy-go-lucky

I'M TRYING NOT TO ASSOCIATE SOCIALLY WITH ANYONE THAT DOESN'T MAKE ME FEEL HAPPY.

+ Love Jesus more completely

BILL JOHNSON (HERO) SHARED AT THE BEGINNING OF THE YEAR ON WORSHIP...AND HOW WHILE ON EARTH, WE CAN CHOOSE TO OFFER GOD WORSHIP WHEN THINGS AREN'T PERFECT, BUT INSTEAD ARE BROKEN, EMPTY, DISAPPOINTING, SAD, FRUSTRATING, AND THIS IS PRECIOUS. BECAUSE IN HEAVEN WE CAN NEVER GIVE GOD WORSHIP FROM THIS DEPTH OF EMOTION. SO BEAUTIFUL.
+ Rock out at gigs at the Wolves Civic

NO. BECAUSE I WORK PRETTY MUCH EVERY WEEKEND. AND I BOUGHT A HOUSE. DANG.
+ Say NO to gossip

I HAVE WORKED HARD ON THIS ONE ALL YEAR. YESSS. 8 PTS!
+ Spend my hard-earned cash on my two passions in life: fashion and music (no wasteful junk)

OF COURSE. CAN'T BELIEVE I PUT THIS AS A "BIRTHDAY RESOLUTION". BUT JUST REALISED THAT I HAVE BEEN BUYING CLOTHES SINCE I WAS 13 YEARS OLD, AND HAVE THROWN LITERALLY NOTHING OUT. MUST FIX THIS!
+ Stop caring about how others perceive me

THINK I MISUNDERSTOOD THIS ONE. DISTINCTLY REMEMBER A CONVO FROM LAST WEEK WHERE I 'CORRECTED' SOMEONE'S PERCEPTION OF ME. NOT A PRETTY MOMENT. BUT BRAVE?!
+ Cultivate PERFECTLY flawless skin

A\';SPO 2@£%(*P$£%POP@

+ Learn to play Hometown Glory (Adele) on the piano

I HAVE NO PIANO AT MY HOUSE TO LEARN. WILL GO TO MY MAMA'S!
+ Fall in love and get married

DEFINITELY NOT ACCOMPLISHED THIS ONE. BUT NEXT YEAR LOOKS GOOD...
+ Write a song

I HAVE WRITTEN ALOT OF POETRY. I HEART WORDS.
+ Be on time for church (maybe even EARLY for pre-church prayer, yikes, is this possible?)

BY DEFAULT I AM ALWAYS ON TIME, IT IS MY JOB!
+ Hang out with the girls in my apartment block

THEY ARE THE ABSOLUTE COOLEST. AND NOW WE HAVE BOYS TOO.
+ Bite my tongue to prevent saying unnecessary hurtful words to the people I love

GETTING BETTERRR! EXCEPT WHEN THE PEOPLE I LOVE BUY DESIGNER FAKES. THEN I CAN'T STOP MYSELF! CHILD EXPLOITATION SENDS ME CRAZY!
+ BLOG and publish baby!

I AM A TERRIBLE BLOGGER. I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT I AM SUPPOSED TO WRITE ABOUT. IT IS SO SELF-INDULGING AND PRETENTIOUS. BUT ISN'T THAT HUMAN-KIND? I SECRETLY LOVE IT!